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Please critique my new sales email

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Occasional Participant

Please critique my new sales email

Hello fellow Constant Contact subscribers

 

I'm an online wine retailer. I just sent out my first email using a new layout. I'm hoping to get ideas for improving it before I send out another one. Thank you in advance!

 

http://archive.constantcontact.com/fs126/1102622079274/archive/1117549404193.html

 

Best

Alex Bernardo

13 REPLIES 13
Frequent Visitor

Re: Please critique my new sales email

I think it looks a little bit squished all to the side and a bit bland colorwise. 

Occasional Participant

Re: Please critique my new sales email


@MarkysCaviar wrote:

I think it looks a little bit squished all to the side and a bit bland colorwise. 


Thanks for the comment RobertoC73. My wife had the same comment! I was trying to match the color with our website but I guess the color on this layout might be too light and may luck punch. The right side does look cramped, I wish I could expand the margin. I was also thinking of reducing the text to create more space.

Visitor

Re: Please critique my new sales email

My initial thought is there is way too much copy (and I am former newspaper so I love words)
You should keep in mind too that wine generally connotes good times, romance, great food etc
Why not incorporate pictures of those kinds of activities?? Readers ALWAYS respond better to seeing other people than to products. Hope that helps
/g
Frequent Visitor

Re: Please critique my new sales email

The logo on the top left is a bit cut off. Also does this redirect them to your website or is it just a newsletter ? It might be too wordy for most people to take the time to read it. Just a few of my opinions. otherwise very lovely.

Occasional Participant

Re: Please critique my new sales email


@MarkysCaviar wrote:

The logo on the top left is a bit cut off. Also does this redirect them to your website or is it just a newsletter ? It might be too wordy for most people to take the time to read it. Just a few of my opinions. otherwise very lovely.


I was trying to create a newsletter with links to the specific products featured. It does look too busy and I might be losing the reader. Very helpful comments. Thanks again.

Honored Contributor

Re: Please critique my new sales email

Far too much content written in a font size far too small for email.

 

Do you have this information available on your website?  Consider removing 80% of the text and linking the articles to your site.

 

 

Tony Schaefer

Let us consult with you on your project.
Accredited CTCT GOLD Solution Provider
Constant Contact All Star 2009-2010-2011-2012
www.cliquemarketing.biz

 

Occasional Participant

Re: Please critique my new sales email


@Clique_Marketing wrote:

Far too much content written in a font size far too small for email.

 

Do you have this information available on your website?  Consider removing 80% of the text and linking the articles to your site.

 

 

Tony Schaefer

Let us consult with you on your project.
Accredited CTCT GOLD Solution Provider
Constant Contact All Star 2009-2010-2011-2012
www.cliquemarketing.biz

 


I agree. The email turned out too busy and cramped. Yes, the same product information is on the website. I'll write a much shorter summary next time and maybe increase the font a bit. Thanks for taking time to review my post!

Occasional Participant

Re: Please critique my new sales email

You want your logo to stand out for branding purposes. You are advertising your company 1st, and then your message. Maybe make the "Mad About Fino Sherry" in similar font style as your logo to keep the flow of the eye going. 

Occasional Participant

Re: Please critique my new sales email


@JackS306 wrote:

You want your logo to stand out for branding purposes. You are advertising your company 1st, and then your message. Maybe make the "Mad About Fino Sherry" in similar font style as your logo to keep the flow of the eye going. 


I'm revamping the logo and increasing the size for sure. Thanks!