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Please critique this product offering...

SOLVED
Solution Provider

Please critique this product offering...

Last time I asked for help I got some great advice. Too bad I didn't find this forum until AFTER I sent my mailing out. 

 

This time....I'd like some feedback before I send out.

 

Thanks

 

Link to mailout

7 REPLIES 7
Honored Contributor

Re: Please critique this product offering...

Thanks for sharing your email with us!

 

It looks good. I would move your logo up to the top instead of the Take advantage of this Free Deal image. I'm afraid if someone opens it and doesn't immediately know it's from you, they may think it's a spam email and delete it.  I was confused by the Tell Me More image. I thought it would actually take me to the first page with all the information that the top image took me to.  I would maybe make that take me to the information page. People may be turned off by seeing an email popup and think, "Eh, I don't know if I want to contact them just yet".

 

Then I would put in a link to email for additional information or if they were ready to sign up.

 

I hope that helps!

Solution Provider

Re: Please critique this product offering...

Great advice! Thanks so much.  

Honored Contributor

Re: Please critique this product offering...

You're welcome!

Honored Contributor

Re: Please critique this product offering...

I thought it was a little wordy and contained too many different typefaces.

 

What is the call to action and how would one invoke that call to action?  Is the "Tell me More" button the way to take the next step, if so its too far towards the bottom and in my mind not correctly worded.     Should it be "Try our forms now"?

 

We are THAT sure you will love this!

Why is the word THAT bolded?  Try this :


"You will love them"

 

You like it, you pay for it. You don't like it, you don't pay.

This is redundant. Try to reduce words that say the same thing.

 

 

And a very important thing to consider. Have you reviewed how effective the message is with images disabled?

 

Sorry for all the mixed text, this system wouldn't let me reformat them.

 

Tony Schaefer
Constant Contact Solution Provider and SMS Marketing Specialist
www.cliquemarketing.biz

 

 

Solution Provider

Re: Please critique this product offering...

Thanks for the feedback Tony.

 

To address each comment...

 

We are THAT sure you will love this!

Why is the word THAT bolded?  (it's bolded for emphasis...since we are offering to do this service for free. But I can see how it can be confusing, and I like your idea. It's simpler)

 

You like it, you pay for it. You don't like it, you don't pay.

This is redundant. Try to reduce words that say the same thing. (you are absolutely right...gonna fix that right now.)

 

And a very important thing to consider. Have you reviewed how effective the message is with images disabled? (the last time I posted a message for critique, someone said that EVERY image should be a clickable link, so that's what I did. Bad idea?)


What is the call to action and how would one invoke that call to action?  Is the "Tell me More" button the way to take the next step, if so its too far towards the bottom and in my mind not correctly worded.     Should it be "Try our forms now"? (I'm not great in the "call to action" area....I'll admit it. However, it's not as simple as "try our forms" because this is a "custom product" that we need to create, so there is usually some conversation about it, and some details that needs to be reviewed. That's why I put "tell me more", because there are more details to discuss)

 

Thanks so much for the feedback...I really appreciate. :smileyhappy:

 

Sheila

Honored Contributor

Re: Please critique this product offering...

"And a very important thing to consider. Have you reviewed how effective the message is with images disabled? (the last time I posted a message for critique, someone said that EVERY image should be a clickable link, so that's what I did. Bad idea?)"

 

I certainly agree that all your images should contain a link as well as a description, although not all email clients use them entirely.

 

What I meant was how does your email look when the images are not seen.  If you don't have a Google Email account get one. By default it shows your email with images disabled.  Send all your email to that account to preview your email.  That's exactly how a large majority of your users will be seeing your piece.

Is that a little better explanation?

 

Tony Schaefer
Constant Contact Solution Provider and SMS Marketing Specialist
www.cliquemarketing.biz


Highlighted
Solution Provider

Re: Please critique this product offering...


@Clique_Marketing wrote:

"And a very important thing to consider. Have you reviewed how effective the message is with images disabled? (the last time I posted a message for critique, someone said that EVERY image should be a clickable link, so that's what I did. Bad idea?)"

 

I certainly agree that all your images should contain a link as well as a description, although not all email clients use them entirely.

 

What I meant was how does your email look when the images are not seen.  If you don't have a Google Email account get one. By default it shows your email with images disabled.  Send all your email to that account to preview your email.  That's exactly how a large majority of your users will be seeing your piece.

Is that a little better explanation?

 

Tony Schaefer
Constant Contact Solution Provider and SMS Marketing Specialist
www.cliquemarketing.biz



WAY better explanation!! I have a Gmail account. I'll send there and see what it looks like. Thanks for that tip...I had no idea. 

 

I did make some additional revisions and sent about 30+ yesterday and about 30+ today. Very happy with the open rate and I've gotten more clicks with this mailing than I have in the past.  :smileyhappy:

 

Haven't been contacted by anyone interested in taking us up on our little offer...yet....but I'm still hopeful. 

 

More to go out next week. 

 

Sheila